Clear Your Clutter

After a few days of the diligent shifting of bags and boxes, the UHaul full of clutter is now decreased in volume by 50%. Clutter is a visual symptom of postponed decisions. That's why half of my clutter consists of 20 years of paperwork. Things like my kids schoolwork, cards and letters, pictures, and everything else. Calendars, scraps of notes, and other detritus of a life misspent on the little things. One of the tasks today is to obtain a good photo and negative scanner to put the most memorable keepsakes into an electronic form. Then I'll mail each of my son's stuff to them to keep if they wish. I no longer need to be the keeper of the clutter.

The other half of the clutter consists of several bins of craft supplies for things I want to do and can make me money, a huge collection of sellable fashion doll accessories, loads of jewelry making supplies, and boxes in which to sell said jewelry. Then there are a few boxes of personal items and clothing. There's a bag of holiday decorations, and a few boxes of books. The books are sellable. Before I can tackle the clutter I have to finish part of my current software project, Then I have to sort, file, and purge the paperwork in order to make the tax people happy. Then I can seriously clean up the rest of the stuff.

I think that the threads of my life will converge at a point that meets sometime in April, May, or June. Yeah, try and plan around THAT! The lawsuit, the taxes, the clutter, and the job. You see, all I want to do is live and work out of a camper van, with a jewelry making business in progress to supplement my income. But I can't realistically do that without finishing the lawsuit, the taxes, and the clutter. Catch 22 all the way around. I suppose I can once again mortgage my life to a job in order to get a few years closer to my preferred lifestyle. This sucks!

Jest in time to take my mind off my troubles, here comes Brock, home from prison! Yeah! His mom drove to Farmington to pick him up. She'll call me when she is on the way back with him, which will give me two hours to finish my chores and run some errands on the way to say hi to him. After that I'm back to the RV to work on my software project. Brock will be going to visit his girlfriend at her Section 8 apartment, where she has her three children and his four children. Yes, you can laugh out loud. His mom and I always get a good chuckle out of it when we think about it.

So I've learned my lesson. I'm not going to be available for loans, babysitting, or anything else. He is expecting a good sized tax refund of which $2500 is due to me for the bail money. Then his mother will borrow $1000 of that to buy a $2000 trailer far enough away that he can't disturb her peace either. In the meantime we will be roommates again. I have my next six days set aside for 3 days of work and 3 days of paperwork, taxes, correspondence, bills, more downsizing, organizing, and cleaning. I'd love to sell more crap on Ebay but may have to hold that thought for a few more months. I'm simply too busy to Ebay these days.

Downsized

As close as I am to feeling that less is more, I realize that I still focus too much on material culture. Admittedly, though I do need certain things in order to be able to forage successfully for my material needs for shelter, clothing, and food, it seems I'm still attached to material things for my enjoyment of life. I think I must like thinking about and planning around "All My Stuff". It's a perpetual soap opera. It jest goes to show you that less is more. My apologies! Trust that I do indeed have far less than I started with seven years ago. And I do focus on a lot of other matters besides things.

I'm at the big trailer doing a load of laundry for myself and my roommate. The Skyler kitty is lovingly placing his paw on my hands as I type. We have been bonding again as I vegetate. It's a heat wave in Missouri, but at least it's a "dry heat". LOL

Mavis and I had visions of enjoying a quiet and peaceful day without any drama, but unfortunately, her son doesn't get it. The baby mama took all four kids for a week last night after the birthday party. He was supposed to go to work today at 11:00 am. At 10:59 am he calls her with a manufactured emergency. He was out of gas and late for work. He had allowed a friend to drive the gas out of the car over the weekend for basically bullshit stuff. The car is not his. The car belongs to Mavis, and she insures it. He lucky to be out of jail and working and enjoying a trailer, electricity, telephone, and cable, plus his rented TV, while he allowed his work schedule to be cut to two days a week. He is about to be fired, we fear. And we don't understand why this idiot decided it is ok to squander OUR resources. She is sick of it and I'm curious why people act like this. She wants to set a boundary, but she is on the bond and there are four grandchildren to be cared for. It would be better for all concerned for her to be the legal guardian of those kids, allowing the parents visitation. This is ridiculous. This latest escapade is merely one in a string of many. He acts like we are being ridiculous. Sheesh!

Nicely Downsized

Life is so much simpler lived downsized. There is a technical name for what I've done, it is called downshifting. I'm a middle-class professional who has made a conscious decision to live a simpler life. There is no upkeep for my "stuff", no upkeep for a fancy car, fancy house, or fancy investments. Basically, my only upkeep is for myself. Today I relaxed outside early this morning with a cup of tea and contemplated for a bit. There was nothing on the "to do" list, other than the impending birthday party for a new nine-year-old.

So I read a book until I felt like taking my shower. Then I dressed all the way down to my shoes and up to my hair and along with a touch of makeup. Then I wrapped the gifts that Marie and I bought for BJ at midnight last night, at the local all-night Wally World. On the way we were in the midst of the state fair traffic letting out and got into a sobriety checkpoint line. We got away ok, but she didn't have her current Geico insurance card. The nice officer let her off with a verbal warning, and we just made sure we came home the back way on the way home. That was the highlight of our day. Two grandmas traipsing to the store at midnight and getting a field sobriety test. That reminded me of the time the old man and I were spooning at Evansburg park in PA and got breathalyzed. I guess it's just me. I attract excitement. >^;^<

Well, we have BJ here with us while his dad and grandpa are cooking and decorating for the birthday party. BJ is getting a Transformers cake and there is a dead carcass cookout going on. So I just ate my tomato salad and a potato and onion stir-fry. I'd take some of the tomato salad, but I doubt it would be appreciated. Marie has been eating my "cooking" for the past month and has lost 10 pounds and is looking more alert and healthy. Oh, Well! I enjoyed the tomato, vidalia onion, walnut, tofu, lemon and avocado salad. My tastebuds were soooooo happy!

When I get back from the party I'm going to spend a relaxing afternoon and evening making and listing jewelry on Ebay, filling and wrapping the orders that came in this morning, and planning for a trip back to Pennsylvania to get the last of my stuff. I should be able to make the trip there and back within three days. I'm not sure how it will work with the mileage. If I can get a one-way from PA, I'll take a bus out and just drive the one way back. It is just so expensive to rent a one-way from anybody.

I'm getting general feedback that the accident case is progressing. With any luck they may offer a settlement before we actually go to trial next year. At this point I don't care as much. Once I decided to just do it and start moving away from the area it seems like things are getting ticked off my list much faster. I have a large collection of miniature items to sell on Ebay, then I'm headed out to get more of the larger items out of storage. Then once I start working somewhere here I'll part with my savings and buy the best cargo van I can get for money. I may be able to buy a nearly new one if I can find a business in distress type of sale. Then I can get the prep work done to make the van liveable.

My list is small and reasonable. I want two vents on the roof, one a solar vent, and the other a wired vent, to maintain ventilation. These will be under a raised area with a plywood cover for added insulation from the sun beating down. On the plywood area I want to have as many solar panels installed as is feasible. Then I want to have as many storage batteries as feasible with the appropriate inverter to charge and run a laptop, hotpot, fans, printer, and lights. I plan to have a trailer that is for storage, plus it will house a generator that I want to plug into the van's system if I am boondocking--I'm thinking about a caged and locked area in front of the trailer, which I've seen before. Heat is the thing I need protection from the most because when it is cold I plan to be in milder temps. I will research and obtain the best air conditioner unit I can find which will be used only when I'm plugged into the grid or am pulling the generator. For cooking I plan to do the same thing I would do when hiking or camping. I usually eat raw foods, but enjoy the occasional soup or stir-fry. That can be down over a hobo stove, outside of my van. If I can run a hot plate or tiny microwave while plugged into the grid, then I will. The hotpot or SmartMug will be fine for tea and instant coffee anytime. I expect that my cooler will need a dollar's worth of ice every other day, if that. I won't be storing meat or dairy products. I'll be keeping drinking water cold, and fresh fruit and vegies cool. So I don't need to carry a refridgerator. For personal hygiene, I'm a tiny gal. I can use a solar shower with a privacy curtain, inside or outside. I will use a child's blowup pool if I'm planted anywhere for any length of time. I have a YMCA membership and I'm looking into getting an annual federal park permit.

I have already obtained my queensize blowup bed. I picked this because it will wedge in nicely in just about any size van, with canvas between the bed and the walls of the van. I don't plan to do much other than insulate the walls appropriately, use the venting and a dehumidifier to cut down on condensation, and hang fabric to make it look like a tent inside. I have plastic drawer systems to bungie cord to the back of the van's seats, as well as a luggable loo for anytime I want to poo in private inside my van. I will also bungie cord two large water bottles to each side of the interior. I have a battery operated pump that fits on five gallon water bottles, for convenience. I also have a solar battery charger, but I need to acquire a stash of rechargable batteries.

So, the downsizing and the planning are well in motion. I just need money to make things happen faster, otherwise it will still happen, just over a longer period of time.

Peace and Quiet

Finally, a break in the madness. I have accomplished about 80% toward my goal of becoming a van dweller. I've downsized significantly and have most of my projects completed. Yesterday I found some bargains while shopping at local thrift stores. We went as far as Waynesville, Missouri, because Mavis had to pick up a free prescription there and we checked out several thrift stores, including Goodwill and Salvation Army. The unnamed thrift stores had the better bargains. I got a relatively modern TV for five dollars, plus about a hundred feet of cable and parts for another dollar. The VCR was ten dollars, and the hot pot for heating water in my room was fifty cents. Brand new! When we got back to Rolla I found a microwave oven on sale for two dollars and fifty cents, which I picked up for Brain, and he needed a small coffee maker which I found for a dollar. I picked up several floor lamps for two dollars each, complete with bulbs that worked. I found a skinny two shelf system to use as a side table beside my twenty dollar blow-up bed. There were other bargains to be found, including a new mop for a buck, a used bucket for a quarter, and a rake for fifty cents. I found new measuring cups, what appeared to be an unused citrus juicer, and a vegetable peeler which I got for another buck for all of them together. Plus a two sets of shelves and a hutch for organizing my desk, altogether for $10. I found nearly new comforters to pad my bed a bit, curtains, and a huge focal pillow that was perfect for lounging with a good book last night. The point of the exercise is that there is no reason to shop in a store without checking out thrift stores first. If I had needed to, I could have furnished an entire three bedroom house for about two hundred dollars. The items I picked up were merely the unused objects discarded by those with debt in the $20,000 range. It just doesn't make any sense, does it? Why go into debt to buy any of it? And most of what I got can be used in a van. Anything else can stay in my little room in a tiny trailer down by the river, where my cats will retire in peace and contentment.

In a few weeks I'll go back to Pennsylvania and get the rest of my stuff out of storage. When I get it all back here I have a small office in the trailer to finish the last of the downsizing and organizing. Half of the 5x5 storage room is filled with family memorabilia and holiday decorations. I plan to scan in all the children's art and writing, pictures, negatives, and etcetera, for creating DVD. That would include pictures of things I'd like to remember, then I can dispose of them. Anything with sentimental value will be dispersed to family. Another quarter of the storage room is filled with items to sell on Ebay. The remainder consists of kitchen items, clothes, personal items, excess toiletries, hiking gear, camping supplies, and other things to just sort through, purge a little, use, and sell as needed. I expect to have all of this completed by the end of September. It's a good thing, too! I'm going to be a grandmother again in March next year. I want to be able to drive up and plug in, to visit and help out.

Today I have several Ebay jewelry orders to fill and wrap, and plan to open a bank account here, at Bank of America. Commerce Bank isn't out this far. I might get the drivers license changed, too. That way when I get back from Pennsylvania I can move my unemployment case out here and start becoming a productive citizen again. I plan to take a minimum wage job and make the extra I'm allowed while on the dole, while I do a really comprehensive career assessment. Heh, heh, heh . . .

What I'd really like to do is play The Sims and vegetate, but that will be more fun later tonight when the TV is hooked up to cable and my beer is nicely chilled. I haven't celebrated in nearly two weeks, so it's time.

More Tidying Up

See the "hoopty car" the "hoopty cat" on the "hoopty road". >^;^<

While couch surfing at my old roommate's house we got her hair colored, visited and enjoyed each other's company, did some shopping, and worked out several survival scenarios for me. I finally got the car loaded up with everything I absolutely needed to run my online business and conduct personal business. The car was divided into six zones. The trunk was one zone and contained the jewelry making tools and supplies, camping/survival equipment, shipping supplies, and miscellaneous stuff crammed into the available space. The backseat was three zones that housed paperwork, Ebay items to sell and listed, and the electronics. That would be the laptop, printer, lighting, postal scale, extra camera, and such. The backseat also contained a box of stuff for my friend in Missouri that I'd stored for her for years, plus five full boxes of dolls and props and items to sell. I'd say I managed to cram my poor little Ford Escort with at least $4000 worth of saleable items. As I drove I was making $60 per day on the Ebay site.

In the passenger seat I had three more boxes crammed in, plus a litter pan, scoop, and a huge animal cage that was broken down so that Spike could sit up high in the pan looking at the traffic and scenery whizzing by. I have some great pictures to upload, however I just bought a new laptop and no software for the camera so that will be a separate project sometime today.

I got on the road around 5:00 pm Sunday night. I made it past Wheeling as I headed west on 70, then I stopped for the night at the 350 mile point. I roughly estimated that there was another 650 to make on Monday. It was more important to get on the road and stop for a rest by 11:00 pm. I stayed at a Red Roof Inn which is pet friendly. Being somewhat organized I brought in the litter pan, Spike and his food and water dishes, my pillow and bag, and the map and directions. I even carry a water heater to make my coffee in the morning. I cleaned up, popped a Benadryl, and sacked out. In the morning I was able to hop out of bed refreshed and rested by 8:00 am. By 9:00 Spike and I were on the road. The car did great and by 9:00 pm I was at the house. I was sweating out the condition of the car the entire trip.

It was great seeing Marie, Brock, and two of the grandkids. These were the quiet ones, thank goodness. I got a load of the younger grandkids a few days later and that was a shock to the system! I'm glad they are staying with their mother, while the two older boys are staying with Brock in the trailer. All last week I worked on my projects and supervised the boys while grandma and daddy were at work. I never heard a word about the potential contract jobs in Philly so the plan now is to take some temp or Walmart work here and earn the $208 a week allowed while still collecting unemployment. Between that and Ebay I should be able to make over $4000 a month with expenses now of just $400. That should certainly help me buy a van by the end of October. It would be nice if the accident case would settle, but I will no longer rely on that.

It is a beautiful Saturday morning. I think we are all going shopping for a cheap computer desk for me to set up a permanent workplace. I expect we will find something for about $20-30. That and a fold-up chair should work fine. So there is nothing much else to share. I have loads of paperwork to finish sorting and handling, and am ready to push major items onto the Ebay store on Sunday. I did find a Universalist Unitarian Fellowship in the area and will try to get to a service on Sunday morning. That may be a good way to network for jobs, vans, and free zucchini and squash. Plus I enjoy doing good works. I see now that homelessness and social justice appear to be my personal missions.

Still Tidying Up

Wow! I got out on Wednesday night after selling the sleep number bed for $375 cash to a very nice young man. We laid on the bed together to get the air out of the inner chambers and just chatted about moms and sons, pouncing on good deals on Craigslist, and working with computers. I was sweating it out a little that the bizarre and crazy roommate would come home and there would be a scene. But she never showed up.

It was a hot, humid, enervating day. I moved out in stages. The first stage you couldn't tell anything was gone and the car was crammed full of my craft organizer drawers, bags or crafts, and other miscellaneous items. The second trip consisted of the two sets of white plastic drawers, perfect for my van one day, plus nearly all of the Ebay items, jewelry business supplies, and every single thing that is important to me. The kitchen still looked like nothing was touched, the AC, TV, and bed were still set up, and the bathroom things were in place. Someone would have had to search my bedroom to glean my plans. But the kitchen cupboard that I used was M-T! Is that stealthy or what? LOL

After Dan came and got the bed, and after we loaded it into his teeny, tiny car, I cleaned the basement, bathroom, and kitchen. Then in order of importance I loaded the car. I didn't get any serious bites for the TV or AC, so I ran them over to my old roommate's house to give to her. She has the cats for me--a real friend! Then I made one last run back to the house for last minute stuff. I actually forgot my bathroom scale and a USB cord for my printer. Dang it! But I was out of there and felt so happy and free for the first time in months. I sang and giggled all the way back to Little Bird's house to spend the night. I told the crazy roommate in a text message the next morning that I was driving the cats to Missouri--all true except for the exact details of when.

As it turned out I couldn't make the trip happen on Thursday as hoped. It was incredibly hot and I was feeling poorly from the stress, the heat, and the lack of good nutrition, and just couldn't get moving. I actually ate nothing on Wednesday which didn't help. It felt like I was getting a cold or sinus infection so I loaded up on fruit and started to recover Friday night. I did a few more loads Friday and was still moving things into storage on Saturday morning. I spent four hours at my son's apartment just going through paperwork and finding his tax information. I threw away four huge garbage bags of paperwork and consolidated everything. My son and I went over his list of paperwork things to do and prepped for his court date Tuesday for a traffic ticket. Then I loaded up the car with more things to give Little Bird and headed over to her house to spend the night.

We went out to dinner last night and watched several episodes of The Rifleman. She gets such a kick out of the phallicly charged opening scene where Chuck Connors is rapidly firing his specially engineered rifle. It is the money shot that makes all grandmas' hearts beat faster. We often wonder if they knew what it looked like when the series was filmed. That little smirk on Chuck Connors face tells me that he knew exactly what he was doing. Heh heh.

So now it is Sunday and I'm still not on the road to Missouri. And I didn't win anything on PowerBall for July 7, 2007. Shoot! It is 8:45 am and Little Bird won't be up for hours. I'll dress and unload the car, and then work on my son's taxes with a nice cup of coffee. Around noon I'll go to his apartment and load my basket of clothes, box of toiletries, and whatever. I'll stuff food into the nooks and crannies of my trunk. Then it's back to Little Bird's house to color her hair and try to load my boxes into the back seat. Anything that won't fit is getting wrapped and addressed to mail to Marie's in Missouri. Little Bird will hold those boxes until I get to Missouri and know for a fact that I do NOT have a job. If I have a job there is no reason to mail anything out there. Then when the car is loaded and I've eaten a veggie burger for lunch, Spike the big fat kitty will be put into the car and off we'll go. It is a 983 mile trip, the beginning of it on the Pennsylvania Turnpike, a long, boring ride. And oh joy, it is the end of a major vacation week and the start of a major heatwave. It isn't getting any better this week. Oh, I have to remember to do some errands today on the way to and back from Dawg's apartment. Close safe deposit box at the bank, return item to Walmart and buy some necessities, see if the Mailboxes Etc place is open today or not, and check the PO box. And leave some envelopes for Dawg to mail my mail to me. Whee!

This is why I'm not on the road yet. LOL

Tidying Up

I think my roommate is starting to get the picture that there is something wrong with this picture. I went to bed early last night because I'm going to be super busy moving out today while she is at work. I woke up to find that the crappy shelves in the dining room have been cleared off and one of the three crappy shelves got moved to the basement. It is too late, of course. Earth Mother is moving on.

Yesterday morning my lithe old bod was wrapped in a very sheer, gauzy little robe that left next to nothing to the imagination. It was about 7:00 am and I was at the computer downstairs in the dining room. I heard footsteps coming down the stairs and assumed it was her, but the masculine voice that said "good morning" scared the crap out of me. I was debating how best to permanently disable him when the owner of the voice staggered into the kitchen to help himself to my private stash of Heineken from the fridge. I took that brief moment to log everything off and dash upstairs where I locked myself in my room and quickly dressed. It is easier to disable an attacker when one is fully clothed. I didn't want to accidentally knock myself out with a stray boob or something.

It turns out that she brought him home around 2:30 am after a drunken debacle at the local tavern where she plays pool and moons over the abusive ex-husband-to-be. She dates the owner there when not picking up strangers. She was still drunk when she had to get up for work yesterday and was still hung over when she got home last night. She makes it so easy for me to leave without a trace. I was going to offer to help her with the August rent, but that offer is off the table now. Her bad decisions have put me at personal risk. There have been two strange men in the house in the past week alone, not to mention the fact that her abusive husband accosted me in a public place. She is still mooning over him and has been at his house at least three nights a week since we moved in together. All it will take is another drunken, maudlin decision to bring him here for a boinking and then what am I supposed to do? She can take the abuse, I don't have to!

Unbelievable! I stopped at my old roommate's house yesterday, where she at least is trying to fix things in her life and has never put me or anyone else into any kind of danger. We had an interesting chat about this situation. Anyway, will add more later. It is nearly 7:00 am and I want to get showered and dressed, clean out my car for loading stuff, and clean the kitchen and basement. I want to get this done before the dingbat gets up and staggers off to work on the 4th of July. I'm not sure how much time I will have to get out today. I plan to leave the bed and obvious signs of my existence on the kitchen counter until the very last moment. If she doesn't search my drawers and closet then she won't realize I'm gone right away. She might get on the road for her tryst at the New Jersey shore without looking too deeply, giving me more time to get out of here. I'm hoping someone will come by and exchange some cash for the bed before 2:00 pm today, so I don't have to move it. I'm not taking any other furniture. I'll leave it for her to sell for cash. Just some nice but heavy wooden shelves and some organizer do-dads. If I don't have stuff I don't need furniture or organizers to display it on!

Countdown

The timetable isn't exact, but I'm doing it. I guess I still have more stuff than I realized. I decided to let people come and pick up the sleep number bed, the tv, and the air conditioner on Wednesday. The roommate will be at the shore that day, and I will be moving stuff out that I do want to keep. I need Wednesday to concentrate on clearing and cleaning my part of the house. I'm basically a responsible person and I want to clean up after the cats where the litter pan was in the basement. Then I will spend Thursday clearing my son's apartment in case I'm not coming back soon, and load the car with just what I want to take. Friday I'll check the radiator and the oil, stop at the bank for cash, and then for a fill up. Then I'll get the cats last and hit the road to Missouri. I expect to arrive Saturday, sometime. It depends on if I drive straight through or stop for the night. I'd plan to sleep in the car except it will be filled with cats, cages, litter pan, cooler, and luggage. The trunk will be filled with Ebay items, jewelry supplies, and packaging material. Wish I had a van!

Tomorrow I plan to get the mail forwarding service and the storage room. Today I kept putting more stuff on Ebay then had nearly 20 packages to mail. It should be the same tomorrow, so it is worth it to delay for a bit. Still no exact news on the job.

I'm fine with it all. I still need to help my son with some of his paperwork. I could do that Thursday. So now I'm resting at his apartment and having a bite to eat. In a few minutes I'll bring in more stuff I brought from the house. Stupid stuff like a brand new ironing board, a broken TV I want to fix (I know I should put it into the dumpster!) and other detritus. Why can't I stop dealing with stuff?

>^;^<

Really Downsizing Now

I don't think I can come up with any more barriers to escaping to a life on the road, at least for awhile. I've been putting more items on Ebay, and they are selling as fast as I can list them. Just some collectible items that I acquired while in the acquisition phase of life, with the great plan of reselling the items on Ebay--voila! That is what I'm doing. I'll keep listing those things today and try to get some charm bracelets listed. I backed off that for awhile to do the downsizing of the collection, trying to get the Ebay business down to a just few boxes and the jewelry making supplies.

The crazy roommate is at work and I'm slowly loading the car while she's not looking. As I mentioned before it perturbs her when boxes go out the door and her psychiatrist says she "must not be disturbed", ahem, "any further." I had been joking when referring to her as the crazy roommate, but I have been finding suicide/attention seeking notes and other things laying around. It's more like the fake suicide notes she doodles when she thinks nobody is watching. For an example of what I'm trying to escape, check out the pictures of the common rooms in the house:









OK, maybe my house looked like that once or twice but come on! After seven months shouldn't something be unpacked? Anything? I live in one small room and it is neat and orderly, even when I'm working on a jewelry or craft project. Is it me, am I expecting too much for $800 a month? Sheesh!

The tiny little spice bottle things in the right corner of the kitchen above, that is the only thing of mine you can see in the kitchen! My sprouts are in my room! LOL

OK, I'm getting out of here. Today is a quiet day of Ebaying my clutter away, and tomorrow is a day of packing and stashing into a storage room. Thursday I'm bugging out with my cats.

Frugal Equals Frugivore

It finally came to me, the answer to a question or rather a dilemma in my life. In a manner of speaking I am in the process of downshifting. I yearn for a more mobile and less wasteful and costly lifestyle where I can avoid spending so much time at work. So I am pursuing a path to simpler living which for me encompasses frugality and at the very least a vegan diet. I've been vegetarian and semi-vegan for nearly thirty years and am renewing my commitment to be totally vegan. As I did a little inspirational research I stumbled upon a frugal diet that is based on our biological heritage as frugivores. Frugal=Frugivore, both from the Latin "frux". Interesting. Normally I thought of food in terms of what was I going to "cook" though a large portion of my diet consists of raw vegetables. I would eat fruit occasionally throughout the day. I knew raw foods are inherently better but like most Americans I am the product of my upbringing and my lifestyle had been busy, if not hectic. So I just did what I knew how to do.

I explored the idea of what a frugivore's diet would be in the natural world. For humans it consists of anything that a primate can get to, harvest, and consume in its raw state. Period. Biologically our bodies are the outcome of millions of years of evolution that culminates in our civilized state of having illness and disease as a "normal" part of life in a world of factory farms, cooked food, and vitamin supplements. Think how freeing it would be, to bring home some melons, avocados, peaches, nectarines, apples, berries, and an assortment of nuts to just graze upon at will. No meal planning, preparation, cooking, or cleanup. I know that psychologically I'm still going to want some hot drinks (not too hot!) and soups, a salad with lettuce and celery and carrots and peppers, and the occasional mushroom. But I think I can try this out for a week and see if it will sustain me both physically and emotionally. If this is successful then this will be the plan for van dwelling. It should save a lot of time and money. The hardest part will be giving up garlic, onions, oils, and hot peppers. Those form the basis of cooking and mostly have to cooked or combined with other foods in order to be palatable. It will be nice to get away from juicing, and most of the slicing and dicing needed to prepare foods to eat. I'll still make salads and cut my fruit into manageable portions, but it should be a lot easier than steaming rice and pressure cooking beans.

As a longtime vegetarian who has always eaten in a non-traditional and healthy way anyway, rest assured that I'm already well-versed in "where will I get my protein from?" as well as my Vitamin B-12. When I was a cooked carrion eater I had pernicious anemia and had to get B-12 shots at least monthly. When as a young adult I suffered from perpetual exhaustion I learned about vegan B-12 methylcobalamine supplements which helped somewhat. When I cut meat, fish, and dairy completely out of my diet and started eating raw vegetables from my garden I never had a problem with exhaustion again, plus I was able to stop the B-12 shots. And I do not believe in "meat substitutes". I'm long past needing or wanting to buy "veggie dogs".

The problem with protein is that Americans have been brainwashed to believe that only meat has protein. Forget food combining, a theory that NEVER had ANY scientific basis, just know this! ALL PLANTS HAVE PROTEIN! Yes, it's true! Carrots have protein, lettuce has protein, even strawberries have protein. The issue is threefold. First, eating animal based protein introduces toxins and waste into your body and you need to consume a lot of protein to get the little bit that you need. Second, eating purely vegetable based protein and excluding grains and legumes, you will be able to easily get the 5-6.5% of protein the human body needs, without having to process toxins and waste products. Third, by eating food that is less complex to digest you need less energy to get the same amount of protein the human body needs from less protein dense food.

My roommate and I are both 50 years old. She smokes, drinks excessively, and eats mostly meat, lots of dairy, and very little vegetable foods. The fridge is full of leftover takeout and defrosting meats that never get cooked because she is too tired all the time. I hike 5-7 miles daily, she hangs out in bars. When we do go out together she looks like a hardened 65 year old biker chick and I look like a fresh-faced 35 year old. She has high blood pressure, super high cholesterol and bad blood serums, varicose veins, heart palpitations, indigestion, migraines, deep wrinkles, puffy eyes with huge dark circles and bags.
She's been to the emergency room for the heart issues and high blood pressure a couple of times in the past six months. I have low blood pressure, no cholesterol, and none of the other problems typical for this age group. When she gets home from work I offer her salad with freshly made dressing, and whatever else I've made. But she has to fry up a slab of dead cow and that is all she will eat with her beer and cigarettes. Interesting...having been there myself I'm very sensitive to this style of eating and know I can't say anything to her. I can only get it off my chest in my blog. I just wish she'd notice that her diet is killing her and is making her look far too old for her age. Oh, Well!

I guess the experience of being laid low in an accident and then battling back physically makes me more aware of the need to be fit and healthy. I can't imagine having to take a pharmacy of medicines everyday in order to exist. It sure won't fit into a frugal, van dwelling lifestyle.

All this typing about food made me peckish, a state between hungry and bored. I polished off a handful of cashews, that is raw whole cashews I had stored in the freezer. So delicious they tasted like butter! Smooth and creamy. Yummo!

Chilling Out

I got through two interviews and now I'm chilling out, though I spent most of the day listening to Lissa whinge about the deprivations of having to do the deposition next week. She's a character. I know she has my back and at this point I'm going to relax and push through with my own short-term plans.

Today I'm getting a bunch of paperwork organized and hopefully will be able to purge more of it. The car is loaded up with the last of the miscellaneous stuff which I will sort and purge at the roommate's house. Then I think I'll just stay in tonight and work on Ebay stuff to list over the weekend. So nothing too earthshaking is going on. I have a vision of what I want to do and will just wait it out to see which way I'm going to jump. If I don't have a job after my son's deposition on the 29th, then I will let Crazy Girl know I'm leaving and I will sell my car, rent a van, pack up everything and the cats, and go to Missouri. I'll leave my "stuff" in a storage locker, put the Ebay store on vacation settings, and bring back the van because it is cheaper than doing the one-way. Then I'll hop Greyhound and head back to Missouri. That will allow me to save more money for the van a bit faster. This waiting is costing me money.

I may consider just taking the necessities in my car. I learned a long time ago not to plan for anything but just have multiple backup plans and the flexibility to jump in the best forseen direction.

Spring is Sprouting

I have pictures of the sprouts from yesterday and today and will post them soon. I spent most of today primping for my birthday celebrations starting tomorrow. Tomorrow I will see my sons and granddaughters, and of course the baby mama (wink). After that, Brutus and I have a night of carousing then the promise of camping under the stars. He's camping in Assateague, poor fool. The mosquitoes there are bigger than the Florida and New Jersey state birds combined. They will knock over the stunted ponies there to get a piece of you. I'm not camping at Assateague again, until I have a camper van ready for a night of air conditioning under the stars. It's not been too bad camping at French Creek in Pennsylvania. Even Springer Mountain a few weeks ago was relatively skeeter-free.

I also spent today putting stuff on ebay, making jewelry, and sorting out a lot of boxes of stuff I still harbor. I found more stuff to put on ebay and organized stuff so I can find it. Lisa called me from Atlanta. They served her with the subpoena today. She and Sam get depositioned on the 19th. We found that odd because Sam was not there when I got hurt. My son gets depositioned on the 29th. My nerves are shot, but if I can maintain my composure until after his deposition then I can find out my attorney's assessment of the proceedings and decide what to do next. Every single time I get a communication on the case I get a shot of adrenaline and the feeling of impending doom. But I will persevere. The case is not my life and my life doesn't depend upon the case. The case will give me a better van to live in, but I can get a van now if I'm willing to make do. I'm holding on, ditching my trash & stashing my cash. It will be ok.

Just got a text from my roommate and asked her to bring me back a six-pack of Heineken, the vegan beer. >^;^< I need to distract myself from the proceedings. If I could turn back the clock to the point where I got injured, I would have immediately upon getting out of surgery the first time sold everything I owned, including the house, filed for bankruptcy, and moved into a two bedroom apartment until I was fully healed. I wasted 7 years trying to get back on my feet trying to keep my former lifestyle. What a waste of effort! But, would I have learned anything if I hadn't gone through this? Hard to say. Hindsight is 20-20. But mostly we are just blind. It is said that most of us are a paycheck away from disaster. I see now that we are all a rent or mortgage payment away from disaster. As god is my witness, I'll never sign a lease or mortage loan application again!

Malfeasance

Whatever you do, don't ever get hurt. As soon as you are injured your life is not your own. I'm in midst of malpractice hell and it has nothing to do with the excellent medical care I've received. It was the deliberate act of an officer of the court that put me in this unwieldy financial predicament. Now I'm in the midst of a process that consists of paperwork and depositions ad infinitum ad nauseum. Now they want to deposition my son--again. I'm trying to keep my real life separated from the case so I am not going to be able to share what I'm planning with my son. We can't have him revealing the true extent of my flakiness by accident. I have to treat this process as though it will go to trial and I can't allow them to "try the victim". My attorney called with three dates for my son's second deposition. I'm waiting for my son to call me back to discuss it. Oh, Well! It is what it is. I have to live through it, like I did childbirth and all those surgeries. I need a Valium, but will settle for a St. John's Wort capsule and a beer.

I plan to work on listing things on Ebay until about 7 pm, then I'll run errands and drop off some mail and check the PO Box. I always feel threatened when I get a contact in regards to the accident case and I need to work on guarding against those feelings. My security is NOT threatened. I can run away any time I want to. The most vulnerable time will be when I've sold the car and before the van is ready. I think I should just sell everything now. There is still a lot of stuff that I shouldn't be harboring. Today I'll sell the larger collectibles and try to get all the miniatures listed by 7:00. I'll make jewelry when I get back tonight.

Beautiful Day

The weather in Pennsylvania is almost typical of the eastern coast and central parts of Florida. It gets hot and humid often. Today it must be up to 83 degrees and feels hotter because of the humidity. There is a haze over the day. But, I still think it's beautiful! I have very few tasks to do and only one or two are actually important, to me. The downsizing is going exceedingly well, but my car is full of work related stuff I need to organize upstairs in my bedroom, and I have that half unloaded. The laundry needs to go into the dryer. The cats are done. The kitchen needs clearing and cleaning. And I may go run some errands. Actually, I have to go to the post office before 4:00 pm. Brain called me this morning to ask for money to fix his brakes. I'm sending some checks to his mom, one for the brakes and the others to hold just in case. I have some excess supplies to return to the craft stores, and I may play trivia after I get some lottery tickets for Power Ball tonight. I too worship and pray at the Power Ball god's temple. Hey you can't play if you don't win, I mean you can't win if you don't play! >^;^<

Busy

May has been a very busy month for me. I'm divesting and downsizing, thinking, rehashing, experiencing, and living freely for the first time in my life without a clear purpose before me for each and every day. Before, I was working, building a business, raising my children, then keeping my head above water after the accident. Everyday was pre-planned and duly executed. In the past few days I have not had anything on the agenda that I *had* to do. Not buying groceries for a household, working, doing paperwork, nothing that simply must be done, not since the Medical Expert consultation last week. So I have increasingly slipped into the routine of being lazy, deliciously lazy. That is just so not me. At least I started this blog as practice for the art of writing and being real with myself. I have lived an eventful and stressful fifty years. I have learned a lot and missed even more lessons that I should have gotten. I sometimes find that I am still measuring myself by somebody else's yardstick. How stupid is that? My yardstick is jest fine, thank you!

The goals are still: downsize and get rid of stuff, stash my cash and ditch my trash, preserve memorabilia on DVD, sell car, buy used van, fix up van for driving, fix up van for living, add hitch and small trailer, and blow this scene. I'm on unemployment until the middle of October, unless the agency messes that up again. I can make over a thousand a month on Ebay if I work at it by listing ten items a day. I have more stuff I could sell. And my accident case may miraculously settle this summer, but we aren't relying upon it. The last time I worked a few months ago I was offered the job of Director of Software Engineering, but for some strange reason that didn't translate into actual dollars, so I'm a little disillusioned with "real work". I have had an extremely hard time getting paid in the past five years, so I'm understandably shy about trying that on again. I have my own ideas for peddling software, but am not in the position to make it happen, yet.

The van is not a bad idea. I am picturing a used cargo van with two front seats and a long body with few or no windows. I will have it fixed up so that the drive train, brakes, and steering are in tip-top shape. Then I will clean it, lay down a rug, fit a bed platform over a storage area, and install my plastic drawer systems. It will start off as being mainly a traveling office, workroom, and storage area, with the plan of using it as a makeshift bedroom as necessary. The hitch will be for towing a small trailer that holds the usual detritus of American culture. The "stuff" I "might need", while the van itself will house the items that matter the most to me and help me make a living.

Like a solar charged auxiliary battery array, inverter, laptop, printer, portable potty, water in jugs, solar shower & plastic tub, curtains, futon on bed platform, litter pan, jewelry making supplies & tools, mailing materials, paperwork, memorabilia on DVD's, clothes, shoes, seeds, beans, grains, sprouters, cooking equipment, books, and personal items. In the case where I would have to put the van in for repairs, the trailer would be the place I store and lock up my "stuff". The trailer could also serve as a place to gather items I find on the road to resell at flea markets. I may be contemplating the freedom of being a homeless bum, but I'd be more of a hobo. An itinerant worker, a gypsy with a portable skill. I'm one more cat away from this goal. And I can't wait!

TooUnfazed

One day I'll tell you why I am too unfazed. But not today. Today I will tell you why having nothing at all is more secure than appearing to have everything. I never was allowed to have anything. It was destroyed, trashed, tossed at the whim of my mother. Or my sister, or my brother, maybe even my father, but I'm not sure about that.

When I was about three years old I remember gathing my "things" into my bed and covering us up in the heat of a hot Florida night. I kept my little hands and feet away from the edges of the bed because I knew that something would get me and take my security if I didn't protect myself. It was a few more years before I knew what it was that would take my security. It wasn't the boogy man in the closet or under the bed. It was my mother. I can say it now without feeling as though a mother is any sort of comfort or security. Definitely I tried to be more of a comfort and definitely security to my own children. But the foundations where laid out then. Less is more, security is nothing at all.

I can't lose much more. There is precious little left. A fire could wipe away everything I claim as my own today and I would survive, unfazed. I'm a Phoenix arising from the ashes. I need to burn it all away to find out who I am. I am more than nothing, and less than everything. Today I came over to my son's to find that he had taken a VCR tape from my private box of things and played it in the VCR. The tapes are over 20 years old and need to be restored, not played. They are reminders of a happier time. He left the tape in the VCR and it was taped over by a soap opera. The lack of respect from a favorite son is overshadowed by the knowledge that I shouldn't take it seriously. I have nothing anyway, what is one more perceived loss?

Brutus said something profound when he first met me. He said I lived like a college student. I had a four bedroom house, but at that point I had sold most everything of value while I tried to figure out how to keep up the mortgage and keep the house. In my room that he saw, I had my PC, printer, mattress on the floor, and the beginnings of my online business. What he will never understand and I doubt I can share with him is that I never had anything, and anything I appeared to have was merely an illusion. So, I continue to divest myself of earthly possessions and ties. And I will see someone about this. Because it will be another path to freedom.

This is really pragmatism on my part. I have never felt as though I had a tie to a place or a thing. I have ties to people, especially my children, grandchildren, and to special friends. I am the cat who walks by himself and all places are alike to me. I read on a formerly homeless woman's blog that she "lost" things in storage when she didn't pay for them. For a brief second I congratulate myself that I cleared my storage room and didn't "lose" anything. But, I can't lose what I never really had. Wow, that hurt to put it into words, yet it is strangely freeing to admit. I feel like I will have the strength to go on for another year or two, as I form a purposeful life and tie up the loose ends of the life I never really expected or wanted.

I used to pride myself on my willingness and ability to think of others and to help them. I find that nobody is left to help me. Of course, what was I thinking? Like Mavis said, you have to take care of yourself first. She is quite liking the idea of me having a van to live in. I respect her opinion. If she says it's ok then I should do it, and soon.

Relationships

Not only did I hike on Monday, after the medical expert appointment on Tuesday I hiked again. This time I went over Mount Joy in Valley Forge Park. I walked the entire trail around to the restrooms then all the way back to George Washington's Headquarters where I parked the car. I must have walked 7 miles within a 2 1/2 hour period. It was so cool, quiet, and peaceful. Had a lot of thinking to do, and came up with a plan. As it stands I'm not having much luck picking up a van that is drivable for several thousand miles. It is going to take some time to get that going, so I have decided to finish downsizing and divesting as I just stay in the house with my roommate. After the fiasco with not getting paid and with the agency messing with my unemployment I was starting to get the urge to run and just get out of here to start over somewhere else. Now that I'm getting unemployment regularly it is easier to make the decision to stay put. I still want to make the trip to Missouri to take Spike-kitty back to his mommy but her situation is still up in the air with her son Brain and the kids and her job, and I need to see what unfolds in the accident case.

I will keep bringing over the things I need from my son's house, box up the donations and yard sale items, and continue to work through the paperwork piles. For once in my life only my most treasured and necessary items will be in view while the rest is being handled elsewhere. Nate is planning to move in with his girlfriend, or at least move closer to his job. We are both working on organizing our crap. We finally cleared out the huge storage room. So I will go ahead and sell the car because public transportation is excellent here, and continue to look for a van. I figure for $1500-2500 I can get a drivable van in fairly good condition, with about $1500 more of work put into it to be reliable. I also need to build up the Ebay business again, while I wait on news on the accident case. The weather has been nice, so I will hike every chance I get in the meantime. I want to lose 10 pounds before my birthday in a few weeks.

Really Doing It!

Today and most of yesterday was a lost cause. But that's ok! The whole idea of being unemployed and soon to be a van dweller is to be a Human Being, not a Human Doing. I had so much going on with phone calls from everybody--when it rains, it poors. I only just starting the packing and organizing phase of my van dwelling life-to-be. It looks like I might be able to hit the road very soon. I am going to stay in the King of Prussia area until after our birthday, Dawg and I. Last year we were 72. This year we will be 74. Yes, my son was born on my birthday. It's a long-running joke between us regarding "our age". We add it together. For some reason it is always an even number. The first year "we" were 28 and zero. The second year 29 and one. Now we should be 51 and 23. There will be 74 candles on the cake this year.
That makes me happy.

But still I've been feeling sorry for myself--just for a couple of hours yesterday. Then I got a call from someone with much worse problems. That has a tendency to make me get over it. I certainly would have felt guilty whinging if I'd have kept it up. I only whinged for about five minutes today. It is ok to be human, really. Just don't dwell on it for too long at a time. Wah, wah...

It all comes back to choice. I decided to give up the house about three years ago. But having crawled up the ladder of "success" only to have jumped off of it due to circumstances, it still hurts. I watch the home shows and remember the plans I had for painting and decorating, and that makes me so sad. Truly, I don't want a house anymore. The conundrum is admitting that I DID choose to leave the idea of a house and permanent home behind, and to accept that choice that I made. After the accident, when I was struggling to get my old normal life back, I would drive to work and it was a 90 minute drive. I would be so exhausted when I got to work that I would lay in the back of my truck until it was time to go in, and I would just cry. I wish that the me of today could have patted the me of yesterday on the head and whisper "you don't have to live like that another day". I wish I had the foresight and courage to put a stop to the "getting and spending" right then. It was too much. You don't see it until it is impossible to go on. What a waste of precious resources.

I watched House tonight, finished today's posting, it's time for bed, oops, I mean futon...LOL

Downsizing

I survived my hike in Valley Forge Park yesterday. I missed the thunderstorm by an hour, as planned. There is nothing more terrifying than trying to dash down a slippery mountain while dodging flying branches and lightning. I avoid that experience as a precaution in my survival planning (tic). It was a quiet day, with few other hikers or bikers. I was really enjoying the peace and beauty of my surroundings until I got several phone calls. One was from my attorney regarding the accident case. You go for years without a word then suddenly everybody needs something from you. Ack!

As for the van dwelling plans, I'm still in the divestiture phase. I have a car to sell, plus a sleep number bed, TV, printer, various small household items, and a very few pieces of furniture. The blowout yard sale was great, but there is always more to get rid of. I have the bed up on craigslist, and am looking for a vehicle to make into a temporary van dwelling situation. Being an ultra-lightweight backpacker I do not need a tricked out van at this time of the year. I have the blowup raft for a bed, a cooler for food and ice, cooking equipment, and lots of plastic drawers for organizing my stuff. I need an inverter, to occasionally run electronics and to charge the laptop battery. I need a bucket with lid for handling waste--can get that at Home Depot. I will need to pick up several big 5 gallon jugs of water that I can refill with a short length of hose. I have a battery operated pump to easily get water out for daily needs. I have a solar shower and can rig up something private with that for cleaning myself up. I'm going for the ambiance of sleeping, cooking, eating, and storing all my worldly possessions in the van, then travel to visit a few friends, and do some serious hiking. I plan to get a used van and clean it up. I'll put a cheap rug in it, wash down the interior, and make curtains for privacy. I think a foldout table and chair would be nice for those times I want to set up a mini-camp and work on my jewelry outdoors. I have fold out chairs for relaxation and a beach umbrella for shade.

One day, if I ever see an end to the accident case and receive serious money, I'll get a "real" camper van to live out of, and pull a nice looking trailer as a "shed". I'm serious about living clutter free. It drives me nucking futz to see crap laying around. My jewelry supplies are all neatly organized and contained in clear plastic organizers. I keep a current ideas basket with clear ziploc bags that contain the inspiration pieces for my next projects. I will put those inspirational baggies together when I'm feeling creative but am too tired to actually assemble something. If the basket is overflowing I work on the bagged ideas systematically until I can see the bottom of the basket again. That comes from being a software engineer and working with queues and workflow solutions. I have access to lots of "stuff" but only work on one item of "stuff" at a time. Yep, that's how a computer works. Except that if I divvy up too many timeslices I go nucking futz over that and have to throttle it back. I really try to focus on finishing each little project.

I also have a routine for selling that involves creating a minimum number of items at least four days a week, then using one day to take pictures and one day to list them. At the moment I have a morning routine that involves printing the sales orders, filling them, and them getting them mailed in a daily errand. Now that I'm going to stop working and be a fulltime van-dweller I plan to use just one day a week to take pics, list, and fill orders. One day a week will be for the city errands of laundry, banking, and posting. The rest of my time is for hiking and playing trivia. There is no other reason to live in a van down by the river, drinking beer and chasing butterflies. I guess my Ebay feedback rating is going to have to reflect my poor customer service practices.

>^;^<

Van Dwelling

As I was researching ways to survive without a permanent home or income (ROFL), I came across http://www.hooptylife.com/. April has had her share of employment issues and describes her own decison to live her life in a van. From her site I learned about the Van Dwellers group on Yahoo, and I've been surreptiously studying their pictures, tips, and strategies for a permanent mobile life. There are legal issues of domicile and even issues with sleeping in a vehicle. Apparently, you are only "allowed" to sleep in a vehicle if it's a bonafide RV parked in a bonafide RV park. I am so appreciative of the things that have been posted. Did you know you aren't supposed to sleep in a vehicle in a rest area on the interstate highway system? I sort of knew that, plus I knew it was a bad idea due to crime.

It is also illegal to sleep on the street or in public view, lest the homeless offend our sensibilities, in most urban areas. Like a sane person would want to do that, but if you are at rock bottom how are you supposed to get back on top? You need an address and a phone to get a job, and you need a job and good credit to get housing. It is a vicious cycle. Yeah, I know that people who have jobs and housing think that the homeless are scum. I call that holier-than-thou attitude the denial that they are only two paychecks away from being homeless themselves. I think the attitude of "it can't happen to me because" I am so perfect, I have planned it all better, I'm smarter, etcetera, is just camofluage for the reality that people are insecure. It's the "it can't/won't happen to me" mentality. I'm so totally not secure anymore that I'm secure in the knowledge that I have the means to survive without sleeping on a public street. I can at least sleep in the woods. I'd rather sleep in a van and be able to move around easily. The van is some protection from thugs, the public, and the elements, while mobility gives you better opportunities to forage and make some money. I'm going to be an upscale homeless bum, a hobo on wheels, a human turtle with my metallic shelter on my back. I have a friend who wants to come with me, but we'll have to get her a van of her own.

I posted this on April's site in March, and I'm posting it on my blog for my own archival purposes. I want to know why I am doing what I'm doing. In a year I'll be in my van down by a river, somewhere.

I am in the same boat now at age 50 as a result of a personal injury, and have been battling my way back to my former career as a software engineer. You are only as good as your last reference and if you spend a year and a half learning to walk that last reference is too long ago for the regular hiring processors.

I reinvented myself as a data analyst and worked for a temp agency at $30 an hour (used to make $80, and yes I saved my money for a rainy day–that doesn’t always work as well as we hope). Then I moved back into software development contracting at $60 an hour. I’m working at a horrible assignment at the moment, due to be over in a few weeks. I will be eligible for unemployment, thank god. And I will be in a better position to get that next contract, I hope.
Anyway, what is different now, from before the accident, is that I have already gone bankrupt, paid cash for a car, and have saved cash for a decent used van. At the moment I live with my son, no lease for me. We can help each other out. But realistically I need to provide for myself and my retirement years. The plan is to get that used van and make sure it is in excellent driving condition first, then my son and I are fixing it up to be a “camper”. That’s what I told him. It’s really going to be my last-ditch effort to live in relative comfort and safety without being in servitude to a lease. I know I need to be mobile and adaptable.

I have everything of value in a storage room, and I’ve pared it down to the most important things for survival. I plan to get a service trailer, like the innocuous ones used by a lawn service, for carrying extra supplies and my “stuff” when I have to become mobile. The plus side is that trailer can be used to make a living trash-picking and selling at flea markets if I have to. I also have an Ebay store where I sell miniature crafts, something I enjoy and can do well, plus it takes up very little space as a hobby and vocation! I keep it active even while working because I know I’ll may need that store to buy gas or food supplies one day.

For my health I’m serious hiker, a vegan, and I grow my own sprouts. You can do this anywhere, even hiking, even in the dead of winter. I love brown rice, beans, salads, and Indian food. With much experience as an ultra lightweight backpacker I think that cooking is the least of my issues if permanently homeless.

I’m considering buying a $200 a month catastrophic health care policy, but for now I’m living on the edge. Maybe if my accident case is ever settled I can afford it. And now I’m saving money to buy mountain property at a tax sale somewhere where I can at least have a permanent address and park the van and trailer if I have to. I could eventually have a well put in. I’d really love to be able to afford a ready-made tiny living space that is towable. I saw one on Oprah a few weeks ago. That would be so awesome! At least I have a dream and maybe I can achieve it. One thing is certain. I will never go back to believing in home ownership or company loyalty and retirement. That’s unrealistic in the present circumstances.

I appreciate all the information I find on this site. This site and others like it help me figure out the best plan for me based on what is realistic.
Thank you, April!

Haven't seen anything posted from April in several months. I hope she is ok.