Simplicity

It was a slow, hard slog through the morass of my belief systems before I finally got it. I knew that something was causing me pain in my life and sensed that it was the sheer falseness of getting and spending. Even during the past two years as I went through the process of getting rid of debt and downsizing I mostly didn't get it. I was still wrapped up in all my stuff.

Lately I haven't posted as much because I'm not dwelling on things anymore, but I want to post about my daily life living out of my van. The van is a nice sized, extended body vehicle with the two bench seats removed. I have a very heavy board over the wheel wells where I keep an SUV sized air mattress. Underneath I keep a crate of gallon water jugs, and bins with cooking equipment and food. The rest of the bins contain clothes, toiletries, a bathing kit, books, and paperwork.

Right behind the driver's seat there are two large plastic containers with three drawers in each. The drawers are latched so they don't open while I'm driving. There is a drawer devoted to quick food and drinks, with coffee, creamer, tea, and hot chocolate. I use a 12-volt smart mug to heat water in the van. Another drawer holds toilet paper, trash bags, port-a-potty waste management items, cleaning supplies, and all manner of paper/kitchen/household things.

A bottom drawer holds batteries, and a battery charger, plus various electrical items like my weather radio and flashlights. Another drawer contains current paperwork items, envelopes, binders, stamps, tape, stapler, and the usual office clutter. The two remaining drawers hold cups, plates, utensils, and condiments. The drawers are to quickly get to things I need. The bins are for when I stop and camp out.

My ultra-lightweight backpacking items hang in an ultra-lightweight backpack from a hook in the van. That holds a Katadyn water filter, solar shower, camping cookware and stove, and basic survival gear. A plastic bin under the "bed" holds extra backpacking gear.

For cooking I've found the simplest solution to be the best. A couple of fold-out wing stoves hold pots over any found fuel such as twigs, paper, and sticks. Some heavy duty aluminum serves as a windbreak. Titanium cookware serves to boil water or saute found veggies. A sharp knife and a cutting board serves as a food processer.

Van Dwelling

I can't believe that I'm finally pursuing my golden dream of living out of a van and traveling the country. The idea struck me about 18 months ago and I've spent my time avidly reading about the lifestyle while making preparation to make it a reality. Obviously I could have just jumped in my car and got on with it, but while I still had a little money and energy it seemed beneficial to plan my escape.

That involved downsizing my vast quantity of consumer stuff and rethinking how I'd manage the daily tasks of life. My dream starts with waking up when I feel like it and having tea and a long read before getting up and about. That meant having a comfortable place to sleep, a place to potty in private, and a way to heat water for tea. That was resolved with a 2000 Dodge Ram Van with an extended body and lots of room for a bed platform, storage, and room to move around. A trucker's 12 volt hot pot for water, and a small portable pot with a toilet seat and lid resolved the next two needs. Around that a fair amount of resources to ensure security and a well-maintained van, plus a collection of consumer items to enjoy life surrounded the idea. So I did it and have come to realize that I've traded one complicated life for another complicated life.

The complications are smaller, but they exist nonetheless. You still have to locate resources for showers, water, and food. You still have to plan for cooling and for heating your vehicle for comfort. You even have to look for a private and secure place to sleep. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but you have traded one set of survival complications for another. But the total cost of living out of a van versus paying rent and utilities is far lower. You aren't going to be maintaining a large job and a large lifestyle.

For a while there I made jewelry and sold it on Ebay for living expenses and I know I can do that again, but now I just focus on writing and selling software components as well as working on remote software contracts. With a small laptop, and inverter, and a broadband connection card it is possible to continue making a living while not maintaining a permanent dwelling.

However, I did go ahead and buy a used trailer for a small sum of money in order to have an official address and a permanent place to leave my favorite cat sometimes. She is ok living out of the van but tended to limit my travel a bit.

I just finished a large software project to integrate a DVR and for now I'll just give my brain a break and contemplate this new lifestyle later.

Processing

I think I got it now. I took two weeks off of the software project from hell and got some things accomplished, including a vacation and handling personal goals. I paid $2500 cash for a very small but well laid out and well maintained mobile home on a permanent site, with a lot rent of $95 a month. The utilities are about $35-100 a month depending upon the season. The owner of the mobile home park is getting out of the rental market, so it was a matter of timing. The outside isn't pretty, but the view from inside is spectacular. It is next door to the $2000 trailer my oldest friend obtained, so this makes a great permanent address for less than $200 a month, in a quiet community.

With the van paid for and well maintained, and my lifestyle suitably downsized, I'm ready to tackle my own plans for writing and traveling, living out of the van. It's time.

When the Van is a'Rocking, Don't Come a'Knocking!

Before:



During:



The van is coming along as I make the changes needed to van dwell comfortably. This is the progress, as I put in the bed platform and sorted necessities into clear plastic bins underneath. I still have plans to obtain 42 inch 2 x 4's, to raise the bed platform slightly. Then deeper plastic bins will be housed safely.



A work in progress, with lots of editing and planning left to do:



The air mattress is an adjustable Coleman SUV model, that is 43 inches wide and up to 70 inches long--the exact width at the back of the van for those of us short folks who can sleep cross-ways. This gives a lot of room for the living space. A nice black bedspread is in the dryer, and will make the bed look more finished, while covering up the under platform storage area.



I especially like the clean lines of the pair of plastic three drawer units that fit perfectly behind the driver's seat. The top is perfect for meal preparation when i'm stuck inside. The drawers house other necessities, like toilet paper, batteries, gadgets, and the like.



Rocky the Van, parked in a quiet neighborhood:



I like the doors, because they can be used to rig up an awning, or even a privacy curtain for outdoor showers.



Next on the list:

• Hitch-Mounted Bike Rack & Locking System
• Custom Reflectix Window Pads - Removable
• Install Alarm, Remote Start, and Locking Gas Cap
• Custom Vecro or Magnet Mounted Interior Window Screens
• Tires & Balance Wheels
• Maintenane (oil, fluids, belts, wipers, brakes, etc.)
• Evaluation (steering, transmission, electrical systems, engine, etc.)
• Ladder & Roof Rack
• Electrical Installation (deep cycle batteries, solar roof panels, wiring, cable, outside box, TV platform, etc.)
• Solar Vent(s) Installation
• Roof Air Conditioner Installation
• Wood Stove Installation (venting outside, removable, fireproof underpad)
• Swivel Seat Installation

The hitch-mounted bike rack will be ordered this Thursday. Friday, I'll buy the materials to make the custom window pads and interior screens, which I hope to finish during a three day van camping trip to French Creek starting this coming Sunday. I may have the alarm and remote start installed on Friday, if someone can come out that soon.

Next week will involve the maintenance part of the plans. I have someone who may be able to install the roof rack, ladder, and all the electrical the following week. I want to get all this done before I head to Missouri for a few weeks.

I'll give up the use of the van for a week in the summertime, to have the vents and AC installed. The AC is planned for use where electric is available.

The wood stove is a real wish list item. I think that a tiny wood stove is feasible, and with reflectix pads and heavy curtains for insulation I can keep the van safely heated off the grid using found wood.

It may take some effort to locate and have a swivel seat installed, but it would make it nice having a reclining seat available to make the interior space feel more roomy, and for guests.

I think with all that done, I can get the camper van improvements rolled into the insurance coverage, but I'll have to research it to be sure. I can't wait to get started!

Camper Van Dwelling

It's Friday, and I'm getting ready to go to French Creek to camp in the van. I need to run some errands and get beer, ice, and food. Then I'll set it up for a nice day of camping out. I reserved an electric site so that I can have light to do my sewing this evening. After spending the last few months picking up 50 cent scraps of black cloth, it's time to make the curtains. There is one privacy curtain going up behind the driver's seat. The rest will be velcro attached curtains on all the windows.

For cooking I'm bringing a long heavy duty extension cord and a power strip for plugging in a hot plate. I simply don't feel like dealing with a propane stove or a hobo stove. I'll post lots of wonderful pictures when I get back home.

Van Traveling

OK, I admit it. This trip to Pennsylvania is about van traveling, not van dwelling. I have so much stuff anyway, I couldn't sleep in there if I wanted to.

Rocky the Van is loaded up so far with both bench seats, all the memoribilia, all the paperwork, most of the office supplies, most of the jewelry, and some miscellaneous items. I have one of the white plastic utility three drawer units in the front bench seat. Next I'm sorting out the clothes in my room so that some is in a bag to carry to and fro, while the rest is in the drawers. Once I empty the other drawers they will go next on the bench seat to be filled. At least they are high enough in the bench seat to keep crap from hitting me when I have to stop quickly. I just ate a quick vegie burger to give me strength.

The other utility drawers are in place, and packed up. Pretty much everything I'm taking is in the van, except for kitchen stuff, the laptop, the monitor/TV, and my bedding. I postponed the trip yesterday because I felt just miserable from the beginnings of a sinus infection. My tail was dragging all day.

Van Dwelling

It hasn't really sunk in yet that van dwelling is more than a set of tasks on my to do list. This time it's just about the van. It doesn't need anything done to it or for it. It just "is". This one isn't about how many generators I can get into it, or when is the vent getting installed, or covering up metal walls. This is a passenger van with two bench seats and carpeting, and is fairly finished inside. The doors are conveniently arranged and the windows are darkly tinted. So even curtains aren't absolutely necessary. I'll check that out later tonight.

I've let my mind go in circles trying to decide what this trip to Pennsylvania means for me. It was mainly about seeing my son and his new baby that is due this week. And secondarily it was about the lawsuit and the trial scheduled for the 31st. The job is out there, too. Though I wouldn't have to be tied to the job. The freedom that is all tied up in that van is something I just can't comprehend the same way I accepted the shackles of restricted living. I can come and go, with or without stuff, really I can.

I've mentally explored endless possibilities in trying to decide what to take, what to leave behind, and how I will live out there. I still have a lot of stuff and if I wanted to stay in Pennsylvania for a month or more, then I don't want to be thinking I'd like to make some soy milk then remember the soy milk maker is in Missouri. I might want to work on craft projects, but the same condition applies. Where is all the stuff? Then what happens if I lose my stuff? This is a George Carlin schtick if I ever saw one. Stuff, stuff! Everywhere and nowhere is the stuff!

I did shop a little for the new van: big toolbox, large rectangular zipper bag to organize van dwelling stuff, a port-a-potty for those nights or days when I'm too shy to go into a facility, LED lantern, and some camping cookware. I have stuff all over the living room of the RV as I'm trying to organize before loading the van before my trip.

The priorities are work (PC, hardware enclosure, laptop, printer, scanner, camera, software), personal (clothes, shoes, toiletries), paperwork (consolidate even more!), memoribilia (scanning project), camping & hiking gear, garden & sprouting stuff, kitchen gear (if I decide to get a place). Nice-to-have would be all the jewelry supplies and tools, and my dolls and crafts. And then there are the cats, Spike and Kristi Belle Belle. My head is spinning.

Do I go ahead and take out the bench seats then put in the living space, which means storing the bench seats in Missouri? Or, do I leave in the bench seats and take all the above items, leaving the cats and the crafts? I don't really have time for crafts if I'm going to visit my son and the new baby, hike as much as possible, finish consolidating the paperwork, and further consolidate memoribilia in the scanning project. If I'm going to stay in Pennsylvania I don't necessarily want to drive all the way back to Missouri to get the cats and the crafts, but I would have to come back anyway to sell the car. Argh! See why I can't stop the voices in my head?

OK, calming down a bit. I'll take the bench seats, work stuff, kitchen stuff, paperwork, memoribilia, and hiking & camping gear. I'll take my air mattresses in case I want a real bed. I'll leave the Spike and take Kristi Belle Belle. Marie will take Spike if for some reason I can't get back here (I hope, he's her cat!). I'll stuff other things into the van, things I can't easily or cheaply replace. Then I'll rent a storage room in Pennsylvania to hold the stuff while I leisurely go through it. This is really, really ridiculous! I'm really not all about my stuff, but I do have some hobbies and I haven't had a chance to work all this out.

This is the life!

To think that just a year ago I was worried about getting my own place to live and downsizing so that I could afford to work less and play more. I struggled with my situation, made lists, schemed, and prayed for miracles. But what finally helped me in the end was just doing it. I worked at a job I didn't like, saved money, got out of "the job", went on unemployment, and just did it. I took a few detours along the way because we humans are like that sometimes. The safe and familiar is more dear, and the promise of better circumstances can be quite a lure. I thought I had a "real job" waiting for me, but that did fall through. It is HARD to change, one of the most difficult things that we can do. You have to be willing to throw your hat into the wide open ring and just do it.

So I did it. After a few painful months of downsizing, I was able to put all my interminable boxes of stuff into a small storage room, load up a tiny Ford Escort with the stuff I considered my most basic requirements, and then I hit the road. Yes, I had a real destination, but it was just a stop to allow me to execute the rest of my plan. I spent my savings on a used Sprinter van which is mechanically sound. Without modifications it serves as a bedroom and kitchenette on wheels. I've already used it for camping, for retiring to after a night of babysitting, and for accessing my jewelry supplies and tools to keep up an online business. I've even gotten back into the software contracting business, also from out of my van. I still have a room in a tiny trailer I share with an old friend. Our goal was to downsize both of us in preparation for an early retirement--two old birds giving each other a hand. But she got sidetracked by her own life and we are essentially keeping up two places between us. Until her son gets out of prison, she's stuck with her grandsons and in her current job.

So I'm rattling around the little trailer, the RV I like to call it. It's a good thing, because it would take a lot of diesel or even propane to keep Henry the van warm right now. We got a hard freeze last night and I tried to sleep in the van, but it was just too hard to function. I think my tv froze and my feet definitely froze in spite of two pair of socks and my thermals. The problem with the van as it is with the bare metal and no real insulation is that it was probably colder inside than outside. The plan has always been to get the van outfitted more like a real home inside, but that does take time and money. Realistically, if I had to live in the van full-time as it is, I'd be farther south by now. Or, parked at a friend's house. But then I'd be spending my spare time insulating. Now I'm working on the practical matter of completing work on the software contract to get some money to stashed. And because it makes more sense to stay in the RV and be comfortable I've been working on winterizing the RV.

Winterizing, you say? Oh, yes. All over the country, wherever it might get cold, poor folks are gathering newspaper, plastic bags, duct tape, staples, nails, and hammers, even old blankets, old sheets, old mattresses, old pillows, you name it, all for valiant attempts to seal up the holes that run rampant in older homes and trailers. I've even lived in a fairly new condo in New Jersey where I would swear that the wind was whistling through the drywall, not the cracks, the drywall itself, right through the coating of paint! I nailed quilts to that wall that went up two stories. I also closed the upstairs bedrooms and moved my children down to the dining room where we lived that winter, with their bunk beds and my full-size bed. I moved in the TV and the VCR and the computer and their toys. We wouldn't have been able to financially survive that winter if I hadn't. If you don't know how to winterize, you'd better pay attention now. Sometimes you have to be ruthless and often you have to be creative.

Winterizing the RV is still in progress but I've gotten a lot done. The two air conditioners are covered with heavy plastic and winter grade plastic tape. They are covered both on the outside, around the window openings, and inside. Windows have been covered on the outside with heavy plastic and tape, while I took a lighter plastic and wound it around the screens, reinserted the screens (where there was no storm window to insert), then taped plastic around all that. I left one window in the hallway untaped, in order to get air when needed. Then the doors, oh my, the doors! I think these doors have never seen a gasket or a weather seal, so I cut strips of felt and glued them to the sides, shut the back door and hung four $1.00 quilts found at the thrift store in the recessed opening of the "back door". The front door has a heavy quilt hung in front of it, plus there is a baffle set up with quilts on either side of the opening. It won't be fun getting in and out, but the quilts can be moved out of the way during the day. I set the propane heater on 62, and use a couple of space heaters when I'm awake. Two quilts on the bed and I don't need heaters at night. I even turn the propane heater down to 58. Then you wear sweaters inside, stay dressed in clothes, and keep your socks on. That completes the winterization of a less than cosy place to live.

Two Nights in the Ozarks

I started this blog entry over a week ago then *things* started to happen faster than I could think about them. Starting from the beginning, the past Saturday and Sunday, over a week ago, were absolutely beautiful. The sky was clear and blue and it was almost too warm. I'm glad that I managed to fit in two overnights out in the wilds of the Ozarks because it's going to get cold.

So I joined a group of local backpackers and we met up at UMR (University of Missouri) around noon and worked out the travel arrangements. This adventure was relatively stationary. We had permission to hike and execute a LNT (leave no trace) camp out in a local national park. While milling around I let several folks look at my "camping" arrangement inside Henry, my van. I alluded to "living out of" the van, but most folks don't catch on to that concept. It's still shady to appear to live out of a vehicle, much less IN it. When I have the modifications done to make Henry look more like an RV inside, then I'll press the idea forward, the idea of living out of a vehicle as a normal option for people to embrace. I'm not hiding it but for casual acquaintances I'm not advertising it just yet.

I'm still amazed at how much STUFF most backpackers think makes a great adventure. To me less has always been more. One older fellow tried to explain to me that my tiny pack was not going to cover two days of backpacking and camping out in the Ozarks. I just smiled mysteriously and asked him if I could snuggle up with him if I found myself in dire straits. He blushed appropriately and changed the subject. I do a lot with a 12 pound lumbar pack and he didn't bother to ask me what my plan was, he just did a typical rush to judgment. Actually I was overpacked for two days out. I do carry over a pound in my tummy pack, plus I carry stuff on my trekking poles, and more stuff in my pockets, so my total weight becomes 125 pounds of me and about 16-18 pounds of my "stuff." But I try to carry NOTHING on my shoulders. That's my weak spot. But compare my 15% body weight sized packing to those 40-70 pound condo packs and you can see why they are so concerned for me. What they don't know is that I can and I have camped out for over a week in the Pike's Peak area of Colorado with nothing more than the contents of a tummy pack. In other words, I have a full amount of survival gear in the tummy pack, and can live for a week on it because that's the training I've received. Lightweight backpacking is not for the average hiker, you need to understand how to survive on basically nothing then surviving on ten pounds of gear is a luxury!

Anyway, the trip was as much fun as backpacking. I like the time spent traveling in a vehicle, having a cup of coffee and a little camaraderie, and transitioning into the new space and attitude. I'm funny that way, for me its the journey not the destination. I took the older gentleman because Henry doesn't have seats for more than the driver and one passenger. He angled himself in position to travel with me. At that point I figured he was either feeling protective or attracted, and possibly curious about my plans for backpacking in the Ozarks with a tiny little lumbar pack. It took both of us to get his condo pack into the van and he still didn't "get it." There is a major rift between condo packers and ultralight packers and the former thinks the latter is just plain crazy and that we don't know how to survive. We had a good conversation, starting with packing for the wilderness. He was still worried about me.

So it started with "Don't you need a tent?" Since he didn't "see" a tent he assumed, I mean presumed that I didn't have a shelter at all. I told him I have a Hennessy Hammock and two tarps that weigh a total of two pounds for the entire setup. "Oh...well what will you sleep in, where's your sleeping bag?" Well, my sleep system doesn't have to be a "sleeping bag" though sometimes it is. For this trip my sleep system was thermals under flannels with two pair of socks and a woolen hat, inside a silk bag, with a bivvy sack backup depending upon the temperature, total weight of five pounds for the extra clothes, silk bag, and el cheapo bivvy sack. "Oh, I'd like to see that, but how are you going to cook?" Well that's pretty easy, my Esbit wing stove is 3 ounces, the six tablets are about 4 ounces, the fire starter is maybe 2 ounces, and the titanium pot is about 6 ounces. I'd say my entire "cooking" system including plastic utensils is less than a pound, and that includes a large folded sheet of heavy duty aluminum foil that can be used as a windscreen or to make a bigger pot. The Esbit fuel tablets are only for backup because the wingstove can use any found fuel, deadfall and twigs on the forest floor. So that takes me up to seven pounds. After that I had a pound of water handling stuff, two pounds of water, a pound of food, and a pound of personal stuff. I weighed it, twelve pounds and I was overpacked! That set the tone for this backpacking adventure.

We got to the parking lot and everybody met in a circle and defined the parameters of the trip. The two leaders were very organized and gave each of us small maps of the area and directions on getting in and out. Then we loaded ourselves up. I strapped on the tummy pack, then the lumbar pack, then grabbed my trekking poles and lccked up the van. I turned around and saw several straining faces as the guys did impossible acrobatic movements to toss those packs on their backs. I tried so hard not to laugh, but my body was quivering in mirth. I'm bad! There were two additional women in the group made up mostly of young fellows from the college. The women were fairly serious and they turned out to be a couple. One carried the tent and the other carried the cooking equipment, so they weren't loaded down too badly. Fit and athletic women can usually fit into a smaller tent, smaller sleeping bags, and can regulate body temperature better. Menopausal women, like me, can sleep in sub-zero weather and open the tent a notch to get some fresh air and that's like no problem. I don't get too many hot flashes thanks to my vegan diet, but I do notice that I really appreciate air conditioning like never before. In any case, I'm of the belief that we women have a leg up when it comes to survival under most any circumstances.

We hiked about six miles to the campsite, which wasn't too bad. A bit hilly, but nothing like the third class scrambles in Rocksylvania on the Appalachian Trail. It took us about two hours to get to the spot and set up camp. There was some friendly competition for good tent spots, and I hung back and let them fight it out. Then I went into a stand of trees and put up the hammock and added the two tarps on each side in a diamond formation. That served as a wind break and a privacy screen. I made sure I had a big rock and a log for comfort while cooking and eating. I hung my packs on the ridge line inside my hammock, which has it's own rainfly. Altogether it was a very cozy, lightweight, quick to set up system. I've spent years working it all out. There was water nearby so I opened up the collapsible pail and brought water to my site for later. We all met in the relative middle of the camp and had some lunch. I cheated with lunch and had a tofu salad pita sandwich with fresh broccoli, alfalfa, and mung beans, dehydrated onions, and one whole tomato. That never tasted so good before. There's something about a hike on one of the last days of autumn that makes everything you eat taste wonderful. And so it went.

Hiking is about planning, provisioning, preparing, and then hiking, eating, eliminating, and sleeping. Your whole world is simplified to the point where you are only thinking about your physical needs and the outside world is far away. No matter what is going on in the outside world, your world is simple and free.

Hiking Day

It was nippy last night in the van. I was snuggled into my bed and had cats trying to snuggle into me most of the night. Henry the van is not set up with heating other than from the regular vehicle heater. The thought of having a remote start to periodically heat up the van crossed my mind more than once throughout the night. I've had that before on the Expedition and used it when camping out or sleeping in parking lots away from home. But we managed. I slept great until about 5 am. No amount of lazing in bed was going to induce sleep again so I bit the bullet and got dressed. That was the hard part! I'm sleeping in thermals next time which should make it easier to get up.

Well I'm dressed now and have some hot chocolate next to me. The laptop is where it's supposed to be, on my lap, and the cats are snuggling up to my feet. I hear the two competing coyote families yipping to each other in the big field beside the big trailer. I wonder how I should manage hiking in coyote country? That's on the agenda for some research before I go hiking with the local college group today. I have bear spray and bear bells on my trekking poles, but I'm hoping to learn that coyotes never try to contact humans during the day. Bears aren't supposed to but lately I'm noticing that the bears don't read the same manuals that I read. I'm still looking forward to the hike and hope that some of the senior members of the group are armed with local lore. There is a renouned ecologist on this hike, a woman older than I, so I expect to learn a lot today. I'm particularly interested in local foods.

In a bit I'll have some coffee with Marie and wish the boys good luck with soccer, then I'm heading over to the RV to drop off Spike and Skyler. They did well in the van but I don't want to leave them in it for two days. When I travel I plan to leave the kitty boys with Marie. Hopefully, I'll have the van set up as an RV before I do extensive traveling so that I can leave the cats while working or hiking.

I love Henry

Henry is the best boyfriend I've ever had. He performs all the functions of a man and best of all requires very little care in return. Henry carries my worldy possessions for me by day and envelopes me in his warm embrace at night. He provides me with security in a hostile world. Becauses he's an older model, but a top-of-the-line model of his day, he commands respect. I have no fear of running afoul of societal mores with Henry's companionship. This means that Henry, my van, doesn't look like a derelict family of drug-crazed hippies lives inside. Henry looks like a modestly successful locksmith's van. Hmmmmm, I wonder if I should look into becoming a locksmith?

Van dwelling is fun now that I have Henry, but backpacking is even more fun--that's my true passion. This weekend is a backpacking weekend. I plan to look for a puppy to raise as my hiking companion, for those places that Henry cannot go. Soon...the way this week has gone I haven't had time to shop for anything. In between getting the van cleaned up and unpacked, the laundry done, and starting a new IT project so I've been digging into the Y2K rations, which are still good. My Y2K solution consisted of sprouting seeds, beans, and dried foods like corn, onions, and spices. I've kept up with that shopping, roughly twice a year, and have rotated my stock so everything is still less than two years old, while most is less than six months old.

I found that I need far less kidney beans than first envisioned. They are too much work, what with soaking, rinsing, and pressure cooking. I far prefer chick peas. Sprouted chick pea hummus is simply fabulous. It's possible to make it without using electricity, and that's a bonus. I just use a pastry cutter, that twisted set of metal blades used to "cut in" butter into a pie dough. Of course you have to sprout the chick peas first, then blanch them for a minute in hot water. Then cut into the two-three cups of sprouted chick peas a couple of lemons or limes juiced, a few tablespoons of sesame oil, and either peanut butter or tahini (sesame seed butter). Sometimes I use whatever nuts I have handy and crush them mercilessly before adding them into the hummus. After the basic hummus is fairly smooth other things can be added, like garlic, or cilantro, or other similar savory things. Once you have hummus you have a highly nutritious food and healthy food, deliciously prepared, that goes well with any type of vegetable crudite. I like eating foods as close to nature as possible, without much cooking. So hummus is a big deal when so much prep time and hot water go into it. It's still delicious and definitely far more nutritious and healthy than anything that is cooked to death.

With that being said, today's repast was as raw as I could make it while running out of fresh produce. I had been spending most of this week babysitting at the big trailer and sleeping in my van in the yard (you can hardly call it a driveway). I got up this morning and after making a cup of oolong tea I fired up the laptop to get a little work in. For some reason my groggy brain was able to quickly solve the highest priority issue in about 5 minutes, which involved 1 hour and fifty-five minutes of testing after ten seconds of typing. The problem was estimated to take 40 hours so I'm about 38 hours ahead. Being a fairly fair consultant I think I'll bill just 12 hours. The guys would bill the entire 40. I guess they can live with themselves, but I don't have to. I fixed a few other problems, too. That means I'm ahead on next week's billing. Since the big boys want estimates to measure the results I'll work to the estimates. Duh! I think the secret to being able to solve technical issues quickly is to purposefully ask my subconscious mind to work on the problem before I go to sleep. In nearly all cases of doing this I wake up with "the answer".

With "work" out of the way I grabbed my morning basket, the basket that holds clean undies and some frivolous toiletries, and ran inside to take care of some daily grooming needs. I "can" clean up inside the van but I don't have to. I live "out of" my van, not "in it". After the cleanup I located the last of the produce and did some food processing with the knife and cutting board. Everything's a salsa. Chop tomatoes, onions, and cilantro, then add some sprouts, and you've got salsa! Use a spoon and a couple of carrot sticks along with some hummus and you have dinner! I made enough salsa to last for at least two days. I'm hitting the farmer's market in Rolla first thing Saturday morning and that should take care of my food needs for the week. I expect to spend less than $10 for a week's supply of fresh produce.

Preparation for hiking this weekend is done. My lumbar pack is set, and it contains everything needed for an overnight camp out. Strapped to that is my fleece bedroll, my Hennessey Hammock, and an inflatable mat. I have a three-season system that weighs less than 12 pounds including water. At first I left out the inflatable mat and just used a combination of silk liner, fleece sleeping bag, and an emergency bivvy sack to mix and match a sleeping system suitable for the weather conditions. But in the hammock there is still a problem with one's backside getting chilled. So the self-inflating mat makes a nicer barrier as a well as a firmer sleeping surface. I can also use the mat for sitting or napping along the way. In ultra-lightweight backpacking, multiple uses are mandatory for any item in the kit. My lumbar pack has room for the heavy stuff in the bottom and also has a top part that has shoulder straps. Here is a review I did a while back: Kelty Lumbar Pack. Yes, I'm seriously into backpacking the ultra-light way.

Henry's First Picnic

Columbus Day brought some great community events and we attended all of them, Henry and I. I didn't locate a TV or antenna but I also didn't look very hard. I may just do more research and buy the best antenna I can find on the Internet and be done with that. A flat screen TV that can double as a computer monitor is probably a good way to go for the television. For my line of work I will need to travel with a server as well as a laptop. In the spirit of ultra-lightweight backpacking, each item in the "kit" has to serve more than one purpose. Although, I do have dreams of laying in a hammock outside my van watching Bear Grylls take his clothes off on my portable TV. We all have dreams. Maybe I can rig up a movable monitor that can hang outside occasionally.

The picnic at the Lion's Club park was fun. I was able to enjoy myself outdoors then take a nap when I felt like it. Nobody was offended and my new extended family thought it was a great idea, having a camper van. They are at a socioeconomic level where being homeless isn't an issue since Section 8 housing is always an option. It's hard to explain to them that I like being independent of government help and I'm willing to work hard to make that happen. I took all four boys on a hike around the biking trails and we kept up a good pace for several hours. The oldest boys, 10 and 12 years of age, had the hardest time keeping up. Little Sean, at the age of three, was able to easily outrun me. I counted on his fear of the woods to keep him in my sights and that worked fine.

These boys are not used to being outside except to go to school or errands. The first time I made the older boys "play" outside brought on tears that broke my heart. I grabbed some spoons and cups, scissors, washcloths, and a few GI Joe toys, and I sat with them by a big oak tree and taught them how to play. We dug out forts and a big pond, then furnished the fort with washcloths cut to size for bedrolls and other primitive needs. I pulled my favorite Backpacking Barbie's out and showed them how we could enjoy pretending that the dolls were camping out. You know my Barbie's are well outfitted with the best equipment, including tents, sleeping bags, picnic tables, and cooking items. The kids were amazed at all these "toys" and I got to share, from a grandma's perspective, the joy of imagination. It was a great time for me, even though my Barbie collection is simply a hobby in my old age. Out of this time outside the boys are learning how to play again, cooperatively and happily.

They are at risk due to a father in prison and a mother with psychiatric problems. I keep forgetting that the simplest things in life are foreign to them. They have never had anything of their own that wasn't lost in an eviction. Every conversation they have is about lack of money and lack of necessities. I guess I was brought to them to teach them about the joys of simplicity and the responsibility we all have to conserve our own resources. I was a single mother with two sons and a foster son and we may have been homeless once but the kids had no idea. Our belongings were in storage and we were packed for a camping trip. In my world, we don't discuss any lack of money with kids, that's called "poor mouthing", but we do reinforce the idea of a budget and conserving resources wisely by shopping carefully and properly preparing foods and using leftovers. I think the positive approach is better than the negative approach characterized by "poor mouthing". That is the practice of constantly stating one is poor or in poverty. I've been broke but I've never been poor.

Starlight Through the Trees

Living out of a van is a few inches closer to nature, like the starlight through the trees makes the stars seem closer, sleeping in the back of a van brings all the sounds of the woods inside. Gee, I can't sleep past 5:00 am anymore! I had to get up and explore the sounds of morning in Missouri.

We still have the little trailer in the RV park, but my BFF Marie is now staying in the big trailer with Brock's kids until he gets released from prison on parole. She plans to take the trailer int he RV park when he comes out and gets on his feet. I can stay in either trailer, but have chosen to set up my living arrangements in the van. This is the real deal and not just practice because it was always my intention to live out of the van. I say "live out of" not "live in" because a vehicle should not define my life. My life is outside of the vehicle and within the vast space defined by my two ears. I am the cat who walks by myself and all places are alike to me. Though I can be tempted inside for amusement and companionship at times.

The Cat that Walked by Himself
by Rudyard Kipling

"HEAR and attend and listen; for this befell and behappened and became and was, O my Best Beloved, when the Tame animals were wild. The Dog was wild, and the Horse was wild, and the Cow was wild, and the Sheep was wild, and the Pig was wild--as wild as wild could be--and they walked in the Wet Wild Woods by their wild lones. But the wildest of all the wild animals was the Cat. He walked by himself, and all places were alike to him."

So, living out of the van means this to me, that everywhere I go my necessaries are nearby without being so numerous that I'm encumbered. It is a rolling closet, with a chest of clothes, a tub of jewelry making supplies, healthy foods, my indoor garden, all the electronic gadgets that an engineer dreams of, and a private place to lay my head. It means that when I get the call to explore the Grand Canyon I can just drive there, stopping to work when I feel the urge and stopping to explore at every opportunity. It means that when my next grandchild is born I can drive there and spend days or weeks without packing or planning. I could have been doing all of these things before the van, but the van makes it simpler and simplicity is the key. I am tired of lists of chores and lists of bills and lists of to do's. I want to be a human being and not a human doing.

Now that the shakedown cruise is done I'm planning to add a good deployable antenna and a small television, probably today if I can find these things at a good price. I guess I'm addicted to the tube because I didn't get to watch Survivor Man or Man vs Wild last weekend and was at a loss. No wonder I jumped at the chance to go sightseeing with strangers without having to unpark the van at my campsite. At some point after some planned van modifications are done I will look into satellite TV.

The planned modifications are: diesel generator, solar panels, batteries, electrical system, rooftop vents, heating & air conditioning, finishing the interior and adding cabinets. I'm only doing the interior and cabinets in order to make the environment more like a home rather than a warehouse. I should take a cue from my friend Marie and use hanging fabrics that can be removed for laundering. Heck, that's were I got the front partition curtains because she's a thrift store fabric aficionado and has tubs and tubs of fabric. I should turn her loose in the van. But I only have a few short weeks before the van goes in for modifications. I'm trying to get the best local RV mechanic on the project and he's jammed up with work right now. I'm buying the items needed and basically am just getting ready.

I have the urge to go camping today but some old business needs attending before I get busy on a new IT contract and there is a picnic to attend later. I think today is a holiday. When you no longer have kids in school you tend to forget the miscellaneous public holidays. Yes I babysit kids who attend school but I'm oblivious to the finer details of their school schedule.

Time Flies in the Cloud Forest

In the cloud forest, time has no meaning. You cannot see the sun, though you can see when it is completely dark. You begin to see the "not sun" and the "not moon" and in those places where you see not you begin to see all. Perhaps that's why monasteries are so often found among the clouds. Places of meditation and purity. That's what you find in a cloud forest.

I took some time lately to do a few earthly things on my list and just came out of the clouds of the Ozarks after a shakedown cruise for the new van. After a very intense and busy period I realized I hadn't updated my blog in over a month. There were some compeling reasons, but those are now behind me. It turns out that my former "crazy roommate" decided that my moving out would be her impetus to getting out of her abusive relationship with her bigamist husband. That stirred up a hornet's nest with him because the D.A. is involved now to deal with the bigamy issue. He did not go quietly and there were a lot of threats and some cyber-stalking. So I took the time to change my blog address and will cleanse the blog of information related to location, names, and anything else necessary to achieve privacy as I re-post former entries. I'm not really afraid of him but I do guard my sanity, what's left of it. I don't need to have to deal with him or her situation any longer. I've also made changes in the amount of time I spend on the Marie and Brock issue with the four children and non-existent parenting. It is so easy to be sucked in and I can be a sucker for animals, friends, and kids. This latest journey of mine was about getting my own life back and I feel like I have it again.

Now for the great news. The new van is a 2002 Sprinter Van with the Turbo diesel engine. I once had a purple Ford Windstar we all called "Barney", and now the new van is called "Henry". I picked him up at an auction in St. Louis for $7000. He may need a new transmission in a few years, but I budgeted for that. My overall budget was $15,000 for a good quality, current century, cargo style van that would be comfortable to live out of and travel in. In keeping with the spirit of simplicity that I strive for in life, this van is simply a shell with a driver and a passenger seat in the front and a partition between the driving compartment and the cargo area. It came with shelves and a toolbox in the back which I've already sold on Ebay.

It is now stripped bare in the back and has an area rug over a plywood "floor", hanging fabric panels over insulation, and some plastic drawers and cabinets attached to the partitions. I put up a double curtain between the partition and opening to the driving area. The inside curtain is a pretty pattern with colors I enjoy. I decided to put up a set of plain white, well lined curtains that are visible through the front windows. The white seems to blend in naturally and seems to be less of a signal that the van might be occupied. It just looks like a workman's cargo van that is closed off in the front. I think that a black curtain might be more of a tip off to security folks. There are no windows in the cargo area, and I checked that you can't see any light leaking from the cargo area in the dark for stealth camping.

In the shakedown cruise I was well outfitted and came back with a very small list of needs. I took two Ozark full size air mattresses to stack for a normal feeling bed, and a portable vacuum cleaner to use in the reverse to inflate "things", plus all my hiking and camping gear, two five gallon bottles of water with one battery operated pump, a luggable loo, and a pantry. I also took the laptop with the wireless broadband connection card, an inverter, a solar battery charger, a solar shower, a small child's blowup pool, and a privacy tent. The privacy tent is for setting up in a camping situation. These are often set up for use as a privy or a place to stand up and shower. I also tossed in the jewelry making table, chair, and supplies, as well as a pop-up screen tent in case I decided to camp somewhere with icky buggies.

For the first night I just stopped in a truck stop parking lot and used the inverter to plug in the vacuum and inflate the mattresses. The nights are starting to get cool in Missouri, so I had two blankets and fixed up a very nice bed cross-wise against the back doors of the van. The luggable loo came in handy, strapped to the partition behind the driver's seat. I used a Good Sense trash bag (nice smell!) with scented kitty litter inside, the multiple cat household variety, of course! This worked out well with one bag a day for my waste. I hate wasting plastic bags, but this will do for now.

I was pretty tired the first night and just slept. I woke up to the sounds of activity about 4:30 am and decided to get dressed and have my coffee. The Smart Mug takes way too long to make a decent cup of instant coffee, though it is great for keeping the coffee at a drinkable temperature. So I used the Rival "hot pot" to quickly heat some water to almost boiling, plugging it into the inverter. I tuned into the local news with my weather radio and fired up the laptop to check e-mail and such. Things quieted down in the parking lot about 6:00 am so I laid back down for a nap until 9:00 am. Hunger definitely drove me out of bed that time and I decided to make breakfast.

The pantry is attached to the partition behind the passenger seat, right by the door. That was so I could open the door and cook outside if I wished. It consists of a set of four large plastic rubbermaid drawers on the bottom, with a plastic cabinet hanging on top. I used a huge, heavy duty rubber band to ensure the doors stayed closed during travel, which worked fine. I have a laminated board cut to size sitting on top of the plastic drawers to protect them from my appliances. There is even a light attached under the cabinets to make it easier to see, the pop-on battery operated style you can pick up at a flea market for less than a dollar.

I had a hankering for some hash browns and happened to have some in the dehydrated food drawer. I used some of the water in the hot pot to re-hydrate them while I browned some fresh cut onions in a saute pan over a single burner electric stove. At that point I decided it might be a good idea to run the van to ensure the battery wouldn't be drained. It also gave a needed boost of A/C to the rear. It may be cool at night, but it's still summer weather here in Missouri and I wasn't camping with the door open just yet. While the hash browns did their thing in the saute pan I manually juiced two oranges, a lemon, and a tomato that I kept in a pan over ice in a large cooler. That was a mighty fine breakfast for my first day in the Ozarks. It was easy to prepare and easy to clean up. I just wiped the pan clean, stashed the cooled appliances back in the appliance drawer, and wiped down my utensils and cutting board with the lemon rind before doing a final wipe with alcohol. I think the citrus fruit rind helped the loo out, too.

The pantry worked fine during the trip. I guess I've been setting up kitchens and cooking over camp stoves long enough to know what might work the best and I'd put more thought into the van setup. The four drawers are organized so that all the heavy canned and packaged foods are in the bottom drawer. The next to the bottom drawer holds the cooking appliances (electric burner, pans, hot pot, Esbit wing stove, etc. The second drawer holds dishes and utensils for eating, while the top drawer holds all the cooking utensils and cleaning paraphenalia. The cabinet has three shelves and I attached lips to the edges with molding and glue so things won't slide out. The bottom shelf has my Biosta sprouters with room for six sprouted crops in rotation. That shelf also contains teas, coffee, Stevia (natural sweetener), hot chocolate, snacks, sea salt and spices. The middle shelf contains oils, condiments, seeds, and nuts, while the top shelf contains paper products and general items. In the middle shelf I also house a dishpan and dishtowels. The hardest part was getting to the water bottles easily. I should probably strap the water bottles behind the driver's partition and move the luggable loo to another location. Decisions, decisions! Anyway, things worked out well.

I got on the road and arrived at my intended destination in time for lunch. I got settled into my reserved campsite in Battle of Athens state park and met my neighbors who invited me over for a barbeque. I grabbed my portabella mushrooms and a squash, a couple of beers, and my lounge chair and had a very enjoyable afternoon that lead to a couple of more beers and an early night. Sometime during the barbeque I made a salad with tomatoes, vidalia onions, tofu, shredded carrots, shredded cabbage, and a bunch of fresh sprouts, including mung beans, alfalfa, and broccoli. For a dressing I juiced six lemons and mixed the juice with grapeseed oil, fresh herbs I grow myself, and some Celtic sea salt. I made this huge salad in my new dishpan and even after sharing the ingredients list with my neighbors that salad disappeared almost before I could get some. That salad plus my grilled squash and portabellas is a meal memory that I'll treasure. No matter that I ran out of fresh produce because it was worth it. I ended up going on a trip with my neighbors the next morning and we stopped for groceries on the way home. It's funny how you can go camping alone and end up meeting people anyway.

Because I'm still helping out with the boys I only stayed out for three nights and days, and had to head home Monday this week to take Dee Dee to soccer practice at 5:30. I stretched my weekend out as long as I could.